Wednesday, April 15, 2009

in the green room...with the truth

"in your face!" spoke the lesson of the moment, bellowing and bitching in my psyche. 
"do you see it? do you get it now?"
"time to figure this shit out girl," it continued on like it was trying to be my friend, knowing all along it was hurting me something awful. but i can't be mad, no, just doing her job, teaching a lesson. 
sometimes the truth just ain't nice, just ain't your friend and you wish you never met her, ever. 
honestly, i'm angry with her, which may seem pointless, emotional and childish. but it feels like a valid little girl anger inside who was disappointed to discover mermaids don't exist to our knowledge and that all people pass away some day or that the universe is never ending. 
1. was it all fantasy? could u be real?
2. damn, EVERYTHING is temporary, every ending is a little death
3. and shit, what do i know about anything? nothing, not a damn thing. 

stuck in non-communication and limbo aftermath 
voicemail and memory
mirrored journey and pattern exposed in a blazing debacle of the heart
i try to stay assured in this
that i can
1. believe in fairy tales and hope one day to see a magnificent creature 
2. cherish everything in my life to the fullest, knowing everything will fall away someday but that it passed through me, that is the blessing
3. find the excitement in the infinite possibilities and surprises of life 

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