Ah Consequences...

Gums bleed.

Fingernails too.

Consequence paid for nights I don't want to look at myself and the thoughts running mad

Lead teeth to pick and bite and tear apart pieces of me

Ah consequences

Self-reflection in a tiny dentist mirror

There is decay and damage here

Each tooth holding a history of food eaten and moments ignored

Each finger, a print, a map with no destination to the chasms in my head

Late arrivals, crashing in front of the TV

Same here under the eyes, the pores open, I pour open

get deeper

get older

Don't want to wash my face, don't want to wash my sins

Leave them on me

Let them sleep in me and me in them

Drunken crashing, colliding with my pillow

Teeth left to rot in the aftermath

of whiskey pools and soda fizz

Like sunburns time again

I left myself out too long

Ah, consequence

What was I avoiding all those nights

eating candy, watching videos, bag after bag of 25 cent deliciousness

long weekends in 7th grade on Grand st. and Bialystoker

By myself when mama went out

Movie after movie, snack after snack

Was I always hiding?

Like each ripple of cellulite

a memory bank of meals

Ah, consequence

What about nights I pretended to brush my teeth

Dad would smell my breath to make sure that I did.

I'd put a hint of toothpaste on my tongue

A small rebellion at a large price

And even still I force myself down the long hallway to face myself

and what I've done to my mouth

8 cavities

3 root canals

4 crowns

one pulled

And a yellow shade of consequence